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Spend time together. For at least five minutes a day, sit or lie together—just the two of you. Cuddle. Talk. Let your bodies synchronize.
Listen more, talk less. Ironically, good relationships involve little talk. Partners communicate via their own private language—subtle body movements, gestures, expressions and a sense of connection that arises only between lovers who grow ever closer as a result of sharing crises.
Do something special for your partner. If you spend your days apart, call periodically during the day and say something like, “Honey, I’ve been thinking about you. I can’t wait to see you.”
If necessary, set an alarm clock to go off periodically to remind you to place the call.
You come to feel love by behaving lovingly, so even the simplest acts of connection can translate to intense sexual feelings.
Have sex only when it feels “right.” Trust your senses. If you rely on your “sex sense” for a month, you’ll soon see that when you do have sex, it is more fulfilling and sensual.
Seduce your partner. Instead of dressing up in a sexy cos-tume—as sex therapists often recommend—use “brain power.”
Send your partner mental “messages” all day long. At night, lie still in bed and send him/her more “sex waves.” You’ll be surprised at how seductive your own brain can be.
Fantasize about your partner. Put on some sensual music and he in bed with your eyes closed. Use your brain—not a vibrator or your hand—and envision yourself making love to your partner.
You may become aroused—even experience orgasm—but mental sex can be surprisingly fulfilling even if you don’t.
*19/47/1*
